Pleakley's Fascinating Earth Things
by The Crazy Chemist
Summary: The curiosity and pure fascination of the one and only Earth Expert. A series of short, cute, sometimes unconnected one-shots. I will post more if you like! Like I have said, I do not own Disney's Lilo and Stitch nor its characters. What's your favorite Earth thing? Let me know in the review section! I may make a chapter. :)
1. Rubber Band

"Oh my! What is this? It's stretchy, it acquires any shape, it can come in a variety of colors, and, and OUCH!" Pleakley winced feeling his now damaged eye. "What's this?"

Lilo walked into the kitchen with Stitch for an afternoon snack. "That's your eye, but I think you mean the rubber band."

"A rubber band?" Pleakley repeated in awe. In all his life, he'd never seen one of these. It was quite fine craftsmanship to say the least. It must have taken years to engineer such a thing, let alone years to actually make it.

"Ih!" Stitch said crunching on some spicy salsa potato chips. He noticed the vat of rubber bands Pleakley had discovered on the countertop. Oh no, he couldn't resist.

"OWWW!" Pleakley cried as Stitch began to laugh, "Hey, that hurt you little monster!"

"Stitch, didn't mean it," Lilo comforted. "That's what rubber bands are for… Besides making huge rubber band balls for the Guinness World Record book."

"World… Record…" Stitch echoed.

"That's just fascinating!" Pleakley smiled playing with a rubber band again. "I should go try this out on Jumba!"


	2. Gumball

"Okay, let's make this quick," Nani articulated as she got out of her blue Volkswagen Beetle. Her ohana, which included Lilo, Stitch, Jumba, and Pleakley, exited the car as well.

Today was a very nice, sunny Sunday. The family had gone to the beach on the opposite side of the island to go for a car ride and to get out of the house for a change. They built sandcastles, played in the water, had lunch, surfed for a while, and enjoyed the sun.

The only remnants left of their eventful day was the sunset, the sand that now encrusted over their hair, or in Pleakley's case wig, the salt that clung to their bodies, and the smiles that they each wore.

"Jumba can you fill up the car with gas?" Nani questioned desperately trying to chase after energetic Lilo and Stitch.

Jumba gave her an evil grin with a wave. "Sure, be going… Jumba can do that."

"Don't start a fire like last time," Nani scowled holding onto Lilo and Stitch by the towels they wore around their waists. After she received a reassuring nod from Jumba, she let them free – free to rocket into the gas station store.

"Stitch, look at these flavors! There's even more here than at Luki's Shave Ice!" Lilo glowed as she and Stitch stared at the variety of slushies. "I bet there's enough to feed a whole raid of zombies!"

Stitch's mouth dropped and began salivating uncontrollably. "Egalagoo!"

"Which one are you going to get?" reaching for a super-sized cup.

Stitch took four super-sized cups - one in each hand. "Cherry!"

"Watermelon wave!"

"Soda!"

"Sour green apple!"

"Grape!"

"Orange berry!"

"Coconut nutter!"

Nani and Pleakley were still at the front of the store. He had caught Nani's divided attention and seemed to be rather fascinated with the red machine that contained a bunch of colorful orbs.

"Sorry Pleakley, I've got to go see what these little twerps are doing." Nani stormed off to the slushy machine. "Are you two _lolo_? You can't eat all that!"

"It's not eating. It's drinking!" Lilo argued already slurping on hers. The five slushies were originally rainbow, but the colors were beginning to merge to form disgusting blacks and browns. "We even got one for everyone."

"Ih!" Stitch nodded, "Botifa!"

"Oh alright," Nani fake-grinned as she noticed an employee observing them. Stitch handed Nani hers as they walked to the front of the store to pay. Pleakley joined them.

"That will be $40.52," The employee stated as Nani shot Lilo a bad look. She was going to have to work overtime for a week to make up for that purchase. "Mahalo," the employee smiled taking Nani's credit card. "Have a good day."

"Say, what's this you got over here?" Pleakley asked as they exited the store.

The employee gave him back a weird look. "It's a gumball machine."

"What does it doo-o?"

Nani had dragged him out of the store. She felt like she was hauling around three little kids – well, at least two of them were little. She wasn't going to pay another cent at that skanky gas station store.

"You put all your money in it and you get a piece of dry, old candy that only has flavor for like thirty seconds," Nani said harshly.

"You forgot about the part where you blow bubbles!" Lilo added pretending like she was blowing a huge bubble. Stitch copied her.

"What is wrong with little girl and 6-2-6?" Jumba questioned as he took Nani's credit card to pay for the gas. So far, so good. No explosions.

"They're just on a sugar high. Let's go home," Nani sighed.

That is, home - where everything was already paid for and where there was no more expenses. Until something broke or they ran out of something.


	3. Curling Iron

You just gotta love Mondays. You wake up extra early to get ready for another painstaking, tiring, working day. In Nani's case, this included working her job at the Rental Hut along the beach shore. She wasn't very excited. The customers and her boss had been crankier than usual and that made for a cranky day.

"Nani, me and Stitch made you breakfast!" Lilo smiled leading her sister to her seat at the kitchen table, which was across from Jumba drinking his coffee. "It's Fruitie Rings cereal with chocolate milk. We also made you a big glass of extra chocolatey milk. Stitch taste tested it. Right Stitch?"

"Ih… Extra!" Stitch agreed with a nod.

"Sounds great and nutritious…" Nani said with a forced smile as she scooted out of her seat. "I'll eat it in a minute, sweetie. I need to go curl my hair first. Mr. Wong, my boss, is coming in today and everything needs to be in perfect order."

"Including your hair?" Lilo smiled.

"Well, you never know," Nani answered leaving the kitchen.

She plugged in her curling iron and waited for it to heat up. She thought about all the possible outcomes of the day. She could be promoted as head Rental Hut employee. She could get into a big fight with a customer. Then, she could be fired. She could be the top seller of snorkels today. That would make her employee of the month. She could be clumsy and trip over all the merchandise and break everything she landed on; that shack was so small for all the equipment it housed. Then, she could be fired again. Think positive, think positive…

"Hey Nani! Watcha doing?" Pleakley asked leaning into her room and interrupting her thoughts.

Nani turned around. "Oh, hi Pleakley. I'm just curling my hair." Nani noticed that the iron had heated up to full capacity and so she began curling it. The last thing she wanted to be was tardy for work. "I'll be back at breakfast in a sec..."

"Curling your hair with that?" Pleakley queried walking into her room and observing her movements.

"Yeah, it's a curling iron," Nani stated as a warm curl dropped to her cheek.

Pleakley could feel the heat of the tool emanating to his green skin. "A curling iron," he repeated continuing to watch her. Think of all the things he could do with that. He could curl his own wigs to make them look extra snazzy. He could curl Lilo's hair for her special hula recitals. He could curl Jumba's three hairs to make him look more handsome. Oh, and don't forget he could use it to heat up some food; that would be the most practical use.

"Okay, time for breakfast." Nani said as she prepared her gut for sugar city. "You coming Pleakley?"

"Yes, of course!" Pleakley smiled getting up off her bed and walking into the kitchen.

"Stitch added more chocolate to your cereal and milk!" Lilo announced as Nani sat down. "Jumba said that the chocolate level decays with time."

"How…" Nani thought for the right word with a cringe, "How …very smart of you…" Nani took her spoon and started eating. Maybe Jumba would be right? She hoped so.

"Your… welcome…" Stitch answered as Jumba nodded. Stitch was eating some Choco Maca Candy Bar Crunch cereal with what appeared to be chocolate syrup as a substitute for the milk. At least she wasn't eating that.

"Okay, you all have a good day!" Nani smiled washing out the layer of chocolate left in her bowl and glass. "Bye!"

"Aloha!"

Ever since Pleakley had seen Nani curling her hair this morning, he had been desperate to sneak back into her room and kidnap the curling iron. And, this is what he did. He locked himself in the only bathroom in the house and began curling his most favorite black wig.

He tried to remember how Nani did it. All he could remember was the bright red light flashing from it. How did it get its heat? Maybe it only heated up for the person who owned it – a locked personal heater. Maybe it was solar-powered? He stuck it out the window, but no luck. Maybe you had to persuade it to heat up? He tried that. Then, he noticed the cord: at the end it had two metal prongs. He looked in the room for the likely puzzle piece that would fit it - the faucet, the toothpaste, Jumba's toothbrush. Wait, none of those items were in Nani's room.

Then, he found it. It was on the wall before him all this time. The red light flickered and a sense of joy filled his body. All he had to do was wait for it to heat up and he could get down to business!

"What is little one doing in there?" A call came from the other side of the door.

"Nothing, Jumba," Pleakley called back fiddling with the hot curler. He wasn't finished yet and he didn't want anyone to see him before his own creation was finished.

"Has been in there long time. Sure it is not nothing…"

"Well, it is nothing…"

There was a long pause and Pleakley had thought Jumba had went off to his lab for some illegal experimentation.

"You see, Jumba drank three cups of coffee and…"

"There's a bathroom out in the ship!" Pleakley argued. He figured that Jumba was going to go out there eventually, why not now?

"But, Jumba needs… to be going now…"

Pleakley could tell by Jumba's tone that the larger alien was rather embarrassed and that this was an urgent situation.

"Okay fine…" Pleakley surrendered opening the door. "Only if you answer a teensy weensy question," fluttering his eyelashes. Half of his wig was curled while the other half was pinned up on top. There were curling iron burn marks forming at his cheeks.

Jumba was at the point of nearly running to the kitchen sink. What could his friend possibly by asking right now, at this desperate time? He couldn't even look at him.

"Do you think I'm pretty?" striking a pose with hands at hips.

Of course, Jumba wanted to answer 'no.' But desperate times call for desperate measures.


	4. Asparagus

Dinner time was always a glorious time in the Pelekai household. Stitch and Jumba never followed any manners. Lilo and Stitch frequently played get-rid-of-the-vegetables-as-fast-as-you-can. Jumba always went on about some new contraption he had made in his lab. Nani complained about her hard days at work. On the other hand, Pleakley didn't have much to complain about; he was utterly fascinated by anything and everything, including these strange Earth family table rituals.

"Can you pass the asparagus?" Nani asked looking at Jumba. It was closest to him and he had the longest arms in the ohana.

"By all means! Be getting these stinking _vegetables_ away from Jumba!" with a belch.

"I have to agree with Jumba," Lilo said picking at hers on her plate. Nani had forced her to take some; her older sister always said that vegetables made children grow healthy and strong. But, Lilo was beginning to doubt that. How could eating something so gross make you healthy? It isn't much different from eating a pile of poop. "Here take mine!"

"Uh, uh, uhh, young lady. Not this again. I'm not going to let you have your dessert until you eat them! I slaved over them for hours!" Nani persuaded taking another spoonful of asparagus.

"Then have mine for your desert if you like them so much!"

"Every… last… bite…"

Lilo huffed as she stabbed her yucky, disgusting greens like a voodoo doll. This time, the voodoo doll was her sister. She hopped her stabs would change her sister's mind so she could eat frosting, sprinkles, and sweetness, oh my!

It wasn't working.

Instead, she tried the classic feed the vegetables to your dog gig, but Stitch just piled his own and hers on her plate making the catastrophe even worse.

"Why don't you like… What are these called again Nani?" Pleakley asked holding up a forkful of green.

"Asparagus."

"Why don't you like your asparagus Lilo?"

He got no answer. It was pretty darn clear why she didn't like it.

"Well, on my home planet, this would be considered a delicacy – like potato chips here on Earth. The flavor is bitter, sour, and mushy all at once. They're finely crafted into stalks…"

"And they smell… _bad_ …" Lilo protested crossing her arms.

"Ih, ih!" Stitch also protested piling the asparagus from Jumba's, Nani's, Lilo's, and his own plate onto Pleakley's awaiting plate. A happy grin appeared on Pleakley's face as a scowl shot across Nani's.


	5. Trampoline

"Pretty, pretty, _pretty_ please Nani!" Pleakley begged at Nani's impatient feet. "I've wanted one my whole entire life!" He held up a picture of a trampoline in a Toys R Us magazine to her indifferent eyes.

"You've only wanted one since you first opened up that magazine this morning," Nani corrected. She was going to be late this morning - again. She needed to hurry up a bit-

"But Nani!" holding onto her leg that was halfway out of the door.

"Pleakley! I don't have time for this! The answer is _no_!"

The front door came to a harsh close. He wanted to sit there on the ground and cry. Mope on the floor all day till she would come home and find him in the fetal position. She would give in then. Why yes she would. What a brilliant idea!

"Why is little one on floor crying over magazine?" Jumba pondered sitting on the loveseat and turning on the TV.

"I WANT THIS TRAMPOLINE!" he wept. Lilo and Stitch were at the doorway observing what was the matter. Wow, Nani thought Lilo's tantrums were bad. Look at this! "BUT NANI SAYS I CAN'T HAVE IT! SHE SAYS IT'S TOO _EXPENSIVE_!"

"This?" Jumba answered taking the drenched magazine from Pleakley's hands.

Pleakley nodded wiping some tears.

"Can have ready in…" Jumba thought for a second. "Ten minutes…"

"Really Jumba?! You're going to make me one!?"

Jumba nodded setting the magazine on the sofa. He had the structure memorized, as though he thought. "Am bored anyway… evil genius mind should have something to do…"

"Oh thank you, thank you, thank you, _thank you, Jumba_!" Pleakley said hugging his friend.

Jumba entangled Pleakley from himself. "Be thanking when it is being done."

After ten minutes, the trampoline was complete, like Jumba had prospected. It was out by their red spaceship. And, it was bigger than what Pleakley had imagined, but it was all he could ever imagine.

"I love it! LOVE IT! ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT!" Pleakley cheered running around the circular structure. "THANKS SO MUCH JUMBA!" running to give his companion another embrace.

"Don't mention it… Is rainproof, fireproof, 6-2-6 proof, force-proof… Can blast to the moon…"

"Eegalagoo…" Stitch wowed pressing the center fabric down. Hey, why not test ride it? He was indestructible after all.

"Get away from my trampoline you little monster!" Pleakley scolded taking Stitch in his arms and trying to pull him off. Stitch had a firm grip and Pleakley nearly hauled Jumba's monster and the trampoline across the whole yard.

"Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr….. Crabba snabba…"

Stitch finally lost hold. The two tumbled across the remaining yard down the hill into the stream.

"I'm going to try it first!" Pleakley screamed running towards the trampoline.

"Naga, meega akoota tay!" Stitch called shaking his fur.

" _Me first!_ "

" _Naga_!"

Surprisingly, Pleakley made it to the trampoline first. It shot him into the sky with a scream. Stitch followed.


	6. School Bus

I couldn't possibly be the day. After the long summer months, Lilo had finally graduated to the first grade. This meant no more naptime, less recess, and a full day worth of learning – not half days like kindergarten. She was very excited. She'd get to spend more time with her 'friends' and finally be treated like a big kid for once.

"Wait, you forgot your lunch!" running Pleakley yelled to Lilo who was boarding the school bus. "The little monster wanted to make it extra special today!"

"Thanks Aunt Pleakley!" Lilo smiled putting her right foot on the bottom bus step and looking up at her disguised wannabe Earth aunt. She peeked a look inside the brown, crumpled paper bag – yum, a peanut butter and tuna sandwich. Licking her lips, her gaze returned to Pleakley. Oh no, not that look again. Not on the first day at school. Of all days!

"So, this is what a bus looks like…" He stood back stunned. "On my home planet, everyone just teleported to school."

"Yeah," Lilo grunted not seeing the magnificence of it. "Well, I better be going now! Aloh-"

"WAIT! Can I take a ride too?" He looked inside through the glass windows. The craftsmanship seemed even better inside than the outside. He just had to!

"Aren't you going to get on the bus _weirdlo_?" Mertle called from an open window. The entire bus was clearly getting impatient.

"Yeah!" Mertle's posse agreed.

"Yes, I will!" Lilo quickly said to Mertle, who was now sticking her tongue out at Lilo.

On the other hand, the answer was of course a 'no' for Pleakley.

Pleakley stood at the side of the road as the yellow school bus whizzed away. A tear formed in his eye and it slid down his face to the dry Earth. He waved solemnly to the yellow dot that disappeared. They just grow up so fast, don't they?


	7. Butterfly Net

"Be giving back net Pleakley!" Jumba called as he raced after his much smaller comrade through the dewy Hawaiian trees. Maybe he should have listened to Pleakley when his friend was going on about how to diet and lose some weight. That could sure help him right now as he leaned on a rock to catch his breath.

Pleakley turned around. "Why, Jumba? You're not gathering anymore genetic material for those little monsters of yours anymore, are you? Why would you ever need it again?"

Pleakley swung the net through the air. The handle was about as tall as Jumba and the net itself could probably catch King Kong himself in one scoop.

"Is part of evil genius lab! Delicate equipment!"

"It was collecting dust! Lilo said it was a butterfly net!"

" _Butter does not fly_!" Jumba corrected laying on the cool rock. How his back was aching; he needed to get to his evil genius massager and pronto. "Is for collecting monsters!"

Pleakley walked over to Jumba, who was looking up at the sun in defeat and pain. Pleakley's tiny hand constricted the net he held. As he towered over Jumba, he let go and a flurry of color pierced the blue sky.

He looked deeply into Jumba's bewildered eyes.

"It's a butterfly net."


	8. Rainbow

Pleakley skimmed through his Physical Earth Geography textbook. Gosh, it had been years since he had taken that class back at G.A.C.C. He could still remember the teacher's name. Wait, Dr. Qlemsabe? Or, was it Dr. Vokhyn? No, that was his Earth sewing teacher. Perhaps not.

He returned to the glossary. Catching up on his intense Earth studies was not the reason for this sudden interest. It had been down pouring outside all day and now he was fascinated by the colorful arch that painted itself between the window frame of his room.

"Channel…? Nope… Strait…? Nope… Volcano…? Definitely nope… Isthmus…? Nope… Archipelago…? Nope… Delta…? Nope… Tornado…? Nope… Hurricane…? Nope… Sleet…? Nope… Rain…? Hey, getting close!"

He thumbed just two more pages to arrive at the feature he so wanted to see.

"A rainbow!" He cheered as he hugged the book to his chest.


	9. Umbrella

Pleakley energetically ran out of the old house to get a better look at the rainbow he had just discovered. Outside, the colors seemed more vibrant – the red, the orange, the yellow, the green, the blue, the indigo, the violet. Hey, where's the pink!?

"You know, there's a colossal pot of gold on one side of that rainbow." Lilo said after Pleakley had interjected his findings. "That's what my teacher said in school. All the leprechauns hide it there."

"Ih!" Stitch agreed. He had attended that day's informative lectures for the afternoon show and tell session.

"Hey, do you want to play with us in the puddles? We're catching worms for our mud pie! We need another worm catcher !" Lilo smiled holding up a bowl of saturated mud and squirming worms.

"Ih! Yum… yum…"

"Stitch, you're not actually supposed to eat it! It's a figure of speech!"

"Ooohh…" Stitch grunted. "Soka…" He spat out the mud and worms back into the bowl as best he could. Lilo gave him a disgusted look as her eyes returned to Pleakley.

Pleakley was unable to answer her question. He shivered and gasped at a sudden bolt of lightning that penetrated the sky and the following thunder clap. Then, the rain – more rain. For puddles and of course more mud pies!

"I better get inside, Lilo…" Pleakley looked up at the sky with a terrified look. Never had thunderstorms been this bad on his home planet; those even made him hide under to covers.

"No need to worry, have my umbrella!" Lilo explained, "It protects you from the sky!"

"Really?" Pleakley questioned looking at the simple device. Stitch was using his umbrella to try to pick a sword fight with Pleakley.

"Yeah! I certified it!" Lilo paused, "Although, Nani didn't certify it…"

Pleakley was convinced. "Sure! Count me in as worm catcher number three!"

The three made mud pies as thunder claps continued in the distance.

* * *

WARNING: Do some research on umbrellas in thunderstorms. What I have presented here may not be true.


	10. Flyswatter

"What are you cooking? It smells good," Nani smiled walking into the house after a workday. She leaned over Pleakley who was stirring the hot contents in the pot. Sometimes her new family was so helpful – making meals, cleaning the house, taking care of Lilo.

"It's chili! I followed your mother's homemade recipe!" Pleakley exclaimed pointing to the old red cookbook that sat on the countertop. "Want to try some?"

Nani nodded. She always loved Mom's chili. After the tragic accident, Nani tried to replicate its classic taste, but could never seem to get it quite right. Maybe Mom had a secret ingredient that she didn't include on the recipe list.

"Close your eyes!" Pleakley smiled as he flickered his fingers.

Nani obeyed. He tried to scoop some chili onto the stirring implement he had found. It was originally hanging up right next to the stove. And, it had many holes, so the soupy part could easily drain through and back into the pot.

"Mmmm… A little meaty and beany, but just like Mom used to make! Thanks Plea-!" Nani stopped talking as she opened her eyes and immediately began gagging. "That's a flyswatter!"

"A flyswatter?" Pleakley asked.

Nani rinsed her mouth in the sink. "We use it to kill flies!"

"Why would you want to do that for!?" Pleakley defended as he hid the stirring implement behind his back. "And, why do you keep it in the kitchen?"

Nani raced to the bathroom to throw up; Pleakley held back her hair. Was that Mom's secret ingredient after all?


	11. Bandage

"OOWWW!" Lilo screamed in pain running into the house through the front porch. Stitch let her lean on his shoulder while she braced her knee.

"What's wrong?" Nani questioned in a worried tone as she ran out of the messy kitchen. She was making a coconut cake with Pleakley. And, they had just whipped up the batter, which ended up on about everything except the bowl and the beater.

A salty tear dripped down Lilo's face. "Me and Stitch were playing," more tears. "He was Dracula and sucked my blood with his sharp fangs. Then, as I was about to fall over dead from anemia, I tried to ward him off my garlic necklace and vampire poison, but I fell and scraped my knee!" The crying continued as Stitch nodded in agreeance.

"Everything is going to be alright," Nani comforted setting her sister on the couch and taking a better look at Lilo's knee. She momentarily left the room and came back with some antiseptic wipes and some bandages. "Let me see that knee of yours."

"Noo! Those tissues hurt!" Lilo refuted hiding her knee. This wasn't new to her. "I'd rather lose all my blood and actually have anemia!"

"No you wouldn't sweetie…" Nani chuckled unwrapping the wipe and reaching for Lilo's leg.

"Really! It's not that bad!" Lilo still refuted. She was clearly out of excuses as she tried to escape from her sister's firm grasp. "OOWWW!"

Nani slapped on a tiny bandage over the clean wound. The bandage was white with red polka dots.

Pleakley, who had been observing this entire scene, unwrapped an extra bandage Nani had brought with her. Like Nani had done, he removed what appeared to be protecting seals for the sticky sides. Boy, those were like glue! He pulled his two hands away from each other, but could not defeat the finger trap.

"Pleakley, don't waste all the bandages!" Nani scowled. She untangled him from the bandage that wrapped around his fingers. "Let's finish making the cake."

"A bandage…" Pleakley smiled following her and looking at the other extra bandages she had stuffed in her back pocket.

Meanwhile, Lilo and Stitch rocketed outside to have more fun playing vampires.


End file.
